To San Francisco with Love
After writing my post yesterday about my prolonged obsession with the small Swedish village in which I now reside, I felt a little guilty and sad for my City by the Bay. I left San Francisco in such a flurry that really I don't think I ever gave a proper explanation as to why I left. I guess my relationship with San Francisco is much like most intense,passionate, long term relationships that we have. Usually, even after the relationship ends you still have love for the great times you spent together. So here it goes:Dearest San Francisco,
First off let me say that is was a very difficult decision to leave you. We have spent all of my twenties together. We had so many amazing times that I will never forget.
When our relationship first started I was so young and hopeful. I felt such a strong attraction to you and I thought that my thrilling life with you would never end. My parents tried to warn me that a life with you would be stressful and expensive, but there was nothing anyone could have done to pull me away from you. I enjoyed shopping on Fillmore Street, as well as eating and drinking at each and every new bar/club/restaurant within the city limits. I joyfully chatted with many, many fantastic people; all of whom just wanted to be around you. You had so much great energy and I had a great time at all of your parties. This lifestyle worked great for me for years, but as time went on I changed.
I knew for a couple years that it was not working out the way it used to, so I moved out of the center of the city down towards Ocean Beach to see if living a little farther away would help. In those years I waited for the bus or light-rail for seemingly countless hours. The rest of my time was spent working downtown among masses of people all day long. Life with you was all consuming but also provided enough inspiration for all eternity. The problem for me was with all the noise around I could not find peace. I did not have enough space create anything that was my own. So what I'm trying to say is, it's me not you.
If my life turns out to be as long as I hope it will,there may be a time when being together makes sense again. Until then you have thousands of different wonderful people who love you and always will. I wonder if you even know I have been gone. Well, it's been fun. I know I will have a great time next time I see you.
Much Love,
Natalie
